Heavy sigh

I am sitting in Creative Arts class and feeling like I am treading water in life right now.  Just hanging on to everything and not able to be fully invested in anything.  I am already concerned about passing the NCLEX and finding a nursing job.  I want to be more involved and invested into my family's lives and just be with them when I am with them.  I want to have time to write again.  I want to finish my "The boy at the stable", "Let's go home" and "Frankie's gone fishing" short stories.  I want to take a vacation with my family.  I want to take a nap!  I just want to work and I don't want to go to school any more.  Aughhhh! (heavy sigh)
Here is a poem written to my wife:

Hello, My Love!

Hello, my love, good morning

I’ve been watching you for a while

I waited till you opened your eyes,

‘Cause I needed to see your smile

I studied the contour of your lips

And watched you slowly breathe

I still don’t believe that a beauty like this

Could have chosen to be with me

I can see your warmth in evening’s sunset

And hear your whisper in the breeze.

I even love the funny face you make

When you are trying not to sneeze

I watch you kneel beside our children,

Softly teaching each one to pray

Helping them learn of their Heavenly Father

And how to converse both night and day

I hear your whispered words of comfort

See your desire to do your part

To soothe the pain of a hurting child

And to touch the lonely widow’s heart

Hello, my love, good morning

What can I do for you this week

Can I say something to make you happy,

Wash the dishes or clean the sink

Make a breakfast of all your favorites

Get the kids all off to school

Try to make you grin or laugh out loud

By acting like a fool

We may not have the newest things

That I’d like for you, my wife

But things don’t make a sleeping child smile

And are not what gauges life

What can I do to show my love,

Give back, for your life with me

I never knew, when you agreed,

What a blessed life that this would be

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Creative arts test number two

In the midst of struggling through nursing classes, I have a creative arts class that requires that I write things for exams.  Normally, this would be a treat, a creative release, a mental stroll.  But not right now!  Anyway, here are two of the questions on the exam.  These are the poetry, literature, and paintings chapters.

(1)    Write a poem using the style of the poet you have chosen in the first question.

                   (which was Georgia Douglas Johnson)

Plans Unfulfilled

I wanted the smile to last forever

I wanted a lifetime of holding hands

Your touch brightened the darkest day

And lifted the heart of this tired man

We planned for old age together

Planned the trips, the projects, the lazy days

You were to be my support and my ally

The one to accept and encourage my crazy ways

You weren’t to go before the sun had set

The doctors, the beds and the pain

This wasn’t what we saw when at first we met

Where is the splashing barefoot in the rain

What am I supposed to do now

Where is the color in my dreams

When will you lean near and tell me how

To live, move on, to encourage me to breath

I lie in bed, looking blankly at the wall

Listening to the crippling silence of the house

I am alone now and life promises nothing at all

For indeed I have lost my partner and my spouse!

(2)    Reread Blake's "The Lamb and "The Tiger" With or without rhythm and rhyme, write a short poem about another animal using it as a symbol for something else you should not name directly.

From the silence

Silent passage through the grass,

he moves, he drifts, he slides

motion, he stops and licks the air

focus and danger in his eyes.

The other, so unsuspecting

Life’s struggles on her mind

Unaware of the hunter’s presence

She teeters along through life

Teeth, long, hollow and unforgiving

Find flesh, bone and skin

Pain and panic, fear unfolding

Innocence lost before life begins

The hunter, feeds with satisfaction

Then disappears as silently as he came

To find more innocent children

To torture, kill and maim

No warning but for a rattle

Nothing for parents to teach or take

To protect their pure and lonely

from the bite of the deadly snake.

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I don't know Haiku?

 I am supposed to write some Haiku's for my creative arts class.  I have not been given any instruction on how to do it or what rules are involved.  The only instruction I have so far is that it is a short poem of 17 syllables distributed over three lines –five, seven, five.  Given this instruction, here are my first attempts.

1)      Speak to audience

Mouth is dry and tongue is thick

Picture them naked

2)      Slice juicy lemon

Liquid splashes in my face

Scream, tears, blurry eyes

3)      Splash, plop, frog in flight

From below a large fish gulp

Last swim of the day

4)      Clouds drifting fluffy

Darkened sight obscures the path

Fall in hole unseen

5)      Ragged breath, wheeze, cough

Hoisted box, stumbled up stairs

Wife complains, wrong box

6)      Shirt and pants too tight

The scale mocks my swollen gut

Tears, a salad night

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St George

Finally found our way to St George after cutting the first two days of the trip for Camden's football practices and first scrimmage.  His scrimmage ended abruptly after the first quarter due to a large laceration below Cam's elbow.  See pictures:













But we hit the pool by about 6:30 pm Saturday night and enjoyed our time immensely.  The boys and I saw the third Batman installment on Monday night.  We found church meetings that started at 1:00 pm on Sunday afternoon because that is when we were finally ready.  Incidentally, it is at the ward house just west of the movie theater, up the block from the Condo.  We enjoyed the pool again for a good part of the day on Monday:

Here is Brayden and Madilyn doing tandem dives.  We left at about 11:50 am on Tuesday and made it back of Cam's football practice and Brook's activity days activity.  Fun time - only our second time down at the condo as a family but well worth it.  Thanks Mom and Dad!!

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Last day of class

The last official day of class for the summer semester.  It has been a hectic summer and I am glad to be nearly done.  Finals are tomorrow and Friday, two each day.

After that - full time work and a three week break from classes.  I haven't had more than a two or three day break from between semesters since January.  I am hoping to have a mental break too and escape with the family down to St. George for a long weekend.  The busy nature of the schedules of teenage children are already popping up to try to derail my St. George break.

I will be taking my LPN state boards within the next month or so.  I will need to study for those sometime this month.

I missed a youth fishing trip with Cam last week (although Cam can't abide fishing - too slow) and I am missing a youth fishing trip with Brayden this week (Lake Powell)  I wish that my finals were earlier in the week so that I could go catch some fish with Brayden - my fishing buddy!  We went through his gear last night.  I supplemented his tackle and bait with some from my own tackle box.  I hope that he does well.  He caught 4 last weekend up at Payson lakes, 3 rainbow and a beautiful brook trout.  It was part of a 3 day Hollist family gathering.  He and Joe ate the trout for breakfast on Saturday morning.  I was at a hospital clinical.

My garden is in mid-summer status.  My zucchini plants are inundating me with produce.  My yellow squash plants were planted about 45 days late and are struggling to decide if they want to grow.  Five plants at about three inches in height each.  Each with a different excuse to why they are not growing more quickly.  I don't want to hear it.  My blueberry bushes are still doing well, new branches with new leaves, good general growth. I am so excited.  I sit by them every few days, examining their growth and discuss with them their plans for the future.  I will have to eventually replant them.  The five plants are each in a black, one foot high, plastic potting container.  I have not yet acidified their soil but they still seem to be troopers for me.

My blackberries are changing daily.  More and more of the fruit are turning black.  It is beautiful to see the new growth for next year as well, three large new branches, a gorgeous plant!  My cucumber plants are out of control, creeping throughout my beans and carrots.  If the yellow blossoms are any indication, I should be swimming in cucumbers in the next few weeks.

I will attempt to build my strawberry tower during my August break from school. The neighbor down the street will be pulling out her strawberries this fall and I will be the recipient of some of the plants.  I need a place to put them and I am nearly out of room.  I found a picture of a strawberry tower on the internet and I think that I will do something similar.

I will put it in the front corner of the garden area opposite the house.  I will build another lattice fence next to it that runs from the neighbor's fence to my arbor.  It will match the lattice fence on the opposite side of the arbor currently covered by green grapes.  This new one will soon be covered by purple concord grapes if plans hold true.  This may be a spring project though.

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Good looks run in the family

In searching my family photo database for a picture of a doll that the girls made up at "This is the Place" village, I found a forgotten picture that is one of my favorites.  Here it is:

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Crazy talk

Brooklyn has tried out for and made an accelerated soccer team in the area.  She is so excited.  She has spent the last week splitting her time between soccer practices and a soccer camp.  Her first preseason game was last night.  Her team won 3 - 0.  She played right defenseman.

Leaking water and puddles in the cold storage led to a removal of the carpet scraps, the water barrels, the scout totes and anything else on the right side of the cold storage.  I mopped up the water, took out all of the water damaged items and set a fan to blow.  Meanwhile, I have made a mess of the the playroom until I can put everything back.  This may be a good time to reorganize the cold storage shelves and to reinventory the food storage to note any shortages to our year supply of food.

I completed my second psych clinical at the state hospital on Friday.  Much more calm and sedate (no pun intended) then I would have imagined.  We (as student nurses) are divided into groups of two and are sent to various units on the hospital campus.  I have been assigned the Adult North East. I have four more state hospital clinicals and two more clinicals on the psych floor at Utah Valley, where I work, this month.  I will then begin clinical rotations on Mom/Baby, Peds, and Labor/Delivery at Utah Valley during the month of July.

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Celebrate growth

Completed Med/Surge and Pharm finals yesterday - painful.  I get a week between semesters - wonderful.  I get to focus on our garden for a few minutes.  I love to garden.  My garden is just beginning to bloom.  I have just a few things in the ground so far.  I still have most of the veggies to plant.  Here are a few things. 

 

Sprouted seeds but didn't mark and can't remember

Pea plant

Thornless blackberry from a 4 inch start

New "2nd" raspberry plot!!!!

 

Both regular and garlic chives

Lettuce

Green grapevine's spring growth

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Congrats to Brayden!!!

Nominated and chosen as 10th grade Student of the Month for his High School!!!  Article with picture in the paper and a catered lunch at the school.  Good for you. It is reflective of your hard work.  Great Job.

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Truisms - I love these - I read them again today and laughed out loud!

Even when opportunity knocks, you still have to get up off your seat and
open the door. 

1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear
your computer history if you die.

2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you
realize you're wrong.

3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I
was younger.

4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.

5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

6. Was learning cursive really necessary?

7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on #5. I'm
pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how
the person died.

9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

10. Bad decisions make good stories.

11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at
work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive
for the rest of the day.

12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I
don't want to have to restart my collection...again.

13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it
asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page research paper
that I swear I did not make any changes to.

14. "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this
- ever.

15. I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello?
 Hello!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine
times and goes to voicemail. What did you do after I didn't answer?
Drop the phone and run away? 

16. I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not
seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste. 

17. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know
not to answer when they call.

18. I think the freezer deserves a light as well. 

19. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or
Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.

20. I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option

21. Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger
and suddenly realize I had no idea what the heck was going on when I
first saw it.

22. I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand
than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in. 

23. The only time I look forward to a red light is when I'm trying
to finish a text. 

24. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and
hunger. 

25. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just
nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word  they
said? 

26. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team
up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong,
brothers and sisters!

27. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get
dirty, and you can wear them forever. 

28. Is it just me or do high school kids get dumber & dumber every
year? 

29. There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are
going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.

30. As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate
drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate
cyclists. 

31. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still
not know what time it is.

32. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating  their
car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the  Tail on
the Donkey - but I'd bet my all everyone can find and push the  snooze
button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed,  first time,
every time!

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